Breaking the Bondage of Narcissism

Years later and I'm still triggered by the abuse. Last night I had to take my youngest (20) to the ER and while she apologized profusely for his late it was (work night(, I couldn't help but remember when my kids were little and I was the only one in the ER with them.   As you can imagine, with 5 kids, that's a lot of ER visits over time.   This morning I'm forced to get up for work on 3 hrs of sleep. Only this time, I don't have an angry, heartless asshole standing over me telling me to,  "Get the fuck up".  (BTW... my daughter is ok).  This memory just makes me resent myself for staying. I allowed him to bully me and dictate everyday as if I owed him. As if he owned me.  It didn't matter if it was a near all night visit to the ER, a fussy newborn or me being sick. Didn't matter.  But let him be hungover AF. Let him be sick.  Me....Jumping up to keep the kids quiet, making sure the TV isn't too loud, not letting any door in ...

We are conditioned from a very early age that, "words will never hurt me". Well they do. Does this dismiss the impact of emotional abuse? And is emotional abuse limited to words? What about actions or lack of actions? The silent treatment for example or total discard.  Why are people not held responsible for this behavior? Why is it that we categorize abuse and only speak up about what is visible? I think there is a lot to say about driving someone to the point of wanting to die.  So let's discuss visible vs not visible. If you see a bruise on a friends cheek, what's the first thing that comes to mind? Certainly not that she tripped and hit the corner of the coffee table.  Does someone need to be crying for you to know they are hurting? Often times the pain is so deep and the vicitm is in a position that requires them to mask the pain. Like being at work, school, out in public. You cant see it but it is there. These are the times that break people down. Th...